Underground Terrapin Races, Blackmarket Crochet, and Breaking into Strangers' Homes To Straighten Their Blinds

If you are in the know, this title is perfect for a story about friendship and unconditional love. Just trust me on this...

     There are few joys in this world like feeling completely loved and accepted for just being yourself. Yes, I have that with my Birdies. And I have been blessed with many friends over the years (especially through Facebook) that continue to share the love and good vibes through all of life's crazy twists and turns. But these feelings have been brought home in new ways this summer by two amazing ladies I am humbled to have in my life...

     The first would be Splintered Sunlight. The best friend I could hope to ask for. Despite the trials and tribulations of her own life she had stood faithful for over 12 years. Tried to be supportive and encouraging in the darkest of times. Given advice. Stood in defense. Let me cry, vent, cuss like a bloody sailor. But thank Jah she's cheered me up, shared more than a few beers, and danced beside me at more than a few shows. Opened her already crowded home so we could relax and enjoy life. Most importantly she has spoken life into my weary soul when it has needed it most. Reminded me of who I am and loves hanging out with Me in the best and worst of times. Thanks Splintered! You kick @$$! 

     Then there's White Owl. You know how you meet people and it isn't long before you feel like you've known them forever? You just click! That's her! New friends are a totally different blessing. One is silver (or white) and the other is gold (sunlight), they say. White Owl lets me be me. To ramble on about The Dead, The Doctor, the Birdies. It's all new and fresh to her, bringing new joy and life to me. New perspective. When I've struggled or been in a poor mood, she's been kind and gracious.  She makes me laugh out loud, very rare for me. Her adventurous spirit births hope for the future and reminds me that this life has so much to offer. Beautiful, fun, crazy, silly, exciting...new! White Owl you are amazing! Thank you for joining this long, strange trip! 

     So obviously, I am eternally Grateful to both of these women! These words could never do justice to how important you are to me! Thank you both for helping me rediscover myself!

   As for the title...I left out shark attacks and othet illicit shenanigans...

Everything Is Gonna Be Alright

The Beautiful Chaos isn't in full swing just yet. I don't get my Birdies full-time from Her until school starts in a couple weeks. I do however have them back this weekend, and am feeling nostalgic for the daze when they were all running around my feet in constant manic joy.

     Nostalgia this evening takes me back to darker days and blessed insights.  Days where Her choices left us alone with hurt and confusion. Tears, anger, and flames type days. Thankfully in those early days the innocence of Birdie youth cast the brightest of light when I needed it the most.

     I refer to my children as my Three Little Birds...you know the Bob Marley song. The story behind it is quite sweet and changed my perception of all this forever. I was doing laundry. Alone. In the bedroom I once shared with Her. Depressed. Doubting myself. Doubting Jah. Wondering if I could do everything I had to do. I took a break and decided to check on the kids who were playing in the living room. And it happened. Thank Jah it happened.
     We listened to Marley a LOT in those days. The Birdies still refer to him as "Uncle Bob" as a result. "Legend" was blasting from the kitchen, but I had forgotten. I stepped into their playful presence. Laughter, action figures, Barbies, and joy were every where. Despite our current circumstances, they were living in the moment. Living. Loving. Laughing. And Jah, through "Uncle Bob", sang straight to my heart.

"Don't worry about a thing
'Cause ev'ry little thing gonna be alright
Singin', 'Don't worry about a thing,
'Cause ev'ry little thing gonna be alright.'
Rise up this morning,
Smiled with the rising sun
Three little birds pitch by my doorstep
Singin' sweet songs of melodies pure and true
Sayin', 'This is my message to you.'
'Don't worry about a thing,
'Cause ev'ry little thing gonna be alright. '"

And there is the moment. Everything IS gonna be alright and MY Three Little Birds' pure and true melodies of love and laughter are a constant reminder.

Tears, Anger, and Flaming Arrows

Currently, I am on the last leg of a nearly 12 year tour with the Birdies mother. The details of why our marriage failed don't really matter at this point. The healing on the other hand does. 
     Healing. There have been more days then I care to count where I wasn't sure it was possible. Days where I've held my 7 yr old, Chipmunk, tight in my arms as she cried herself to sleep. Days where The Sidekick, 10, was angry with me over situations he couldn't understand and I couldn't fully explain. Days where forked tongues and flaming arrows seemed to rule over grace and mercy. The real trick here is seeing that the tears, the anger, and the flames are in fact vital to the healing and are actually part of the grace and mercy I've so desperately sought in the darkest of days.
    The Cross. There we see the saddest of tears, the most brutal of anger, and the flames seeming to rise higher then ever before. And for what? So His ultimate grace and mercy could bring us all a deeper healing than we could've ever imagined.
     

    
    

What's In A Name?

So begins my blog! This is something I've considered doing for sometime now, but I am horribly out of practice. Since the first rule of writing is to write what you know about, why not my crazy normal life as a Deadhead/Whovian/Daddy/believer and the adventures that occur? Surely, someone out there will find this interesting? Right? Hahaha!

So what's with the name of this blog? The first half should be fairly obvious. I mostly view my self as a daddy and a fan of Grateful Dead, so there you go. The second half of the title stems from a conversation I had recently with a good friend of mine, White Owl.  In describing my daily life with my 3 Little Birds, I had told her it was chaos - in the most beautiful way possible. I liked the sound of that! The various noises, shouts, screams, laughter, unending cartoons/video games, body functions, etc of raising a 10 year old boy and 7 & 4 year old daughters alone in a tiny 3 bedroom apartment. Chaotic yet more beautiful than anything I have ever experienced!